


Trust Issues

by musicalsarelife



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Arguing, Barry is an amazing boyfriend and brother in law, Communication, Dealing with "Back soon", Family, Family Issues, Gen, Making Up, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:28:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24302134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicalsarelife/pseuds/musicalsarelife
Summary: Lup wasn’t entirely sure how this happened.She and Taako were having fun. They had been talking and laughing. Cooking! Their flow in the kitchen was nearly what it had been their entire time on the road.And, now…they were staring at each other. Facing off. Lup thought she was going to cry. Or scream.“You don’t trust me?"
Relationships: Barry Bluejeans/Lup, Lup & Taako (The Adventure Zone)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 82





	Trust Issues

Lup wasn’t entirely sure how this happened.

She and Taako were having fun. They had been talking and laughing. Cooking! Their flow in the kitchen was nearly what it had been their entire time on the road.

And, now…they were staring at each other. Facing off. Lup thought she was going to cry. Or scream.

_“Add an extra teaspoon of cinnamon to that batter, bro.”_

_“Nah, that’ll be too much spice.” Taako shook his head._

_“Has bone daddy wrecked your senses? That spice makes this cake!”_

_“I think it’s the opposite. Your man made of oatmeal and bluejeans has clearly dulled your tongue, and you need the extra stimulation.”_

_“Oh, trust me, Barry has done nothing to dull my tongue.” She said with a wink._

_“Gross.”_

_“Oh come on! Don’t you trust me?” She laughed._

_“I…I–yeah, of course.”_

It was a second. A moment of hesitation. Anyone who didn’t know her brother like the back of their hand wouldn’t have even registered the pause. But, she did. Or, she thought she did. Maybe she was wrong.

“You don’t trust me?” Lup took a deep breath, as she stared her brother down.

Taako, for his own part, had the decency to look shocked at his own words, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape, working to form words. “…I didn’t say that.”

“Taako!”

“Lup, just drop it.”  


Taako wasn’t answering her. Taako was avoiding her questions.

“No! You don’t trust me!” 

Taako turned pointedly towards the cake batter, stirring maybe a little frantically. “So? I don’t trust anyone.”

Lup felt sick. Her brother. _Her heart._ Didn’t trust her.

“But–” Lup choked for a second, “I’m your twin.” She tried to regulate her breathing to avoid crying.

Taako remained silent, his jaw set hard.

“Taako…” In spite of her efforts, Lup felt tears roll down her cheeks. “I’m your sister. We’ve been together forever.”

“Not forever…” He mumbled.

“What are you talking about?”

Taako looked like he was blinking back his own tears. “You were gone for twelve years.”

Suddenly, Lup felt her anguish harden, heartbreak transforming into something like rage. “What the fuck–“

“Lup, you–”

“I was trapped! In a fucking umbrella!” _Darkness. Cold. Empty. Black curtains._

“Yeah, and whose fault was that?” Taako snapped, finally turning to her. _How could he be saying this?_

“I WAS LITERALLY IN AN UMBRELLA, TAAKO! I WAS ALONE!” _Nothingness._

“Well, I was alone, too!”

_Still nothing._

Lup turned on her heel and walked away.

Taako called after her. “Where are you going?”

“Home.”

“Lulu–”

“No, if you’re going to decide not to trust me, because I WAS TRAPPED AND ALONE, you can just go fuck off until you come to your senses.”

“Lup–”

She summoned her scythe and didn’t hear anything else over the rip between planes, as she escaped from Taako’s kitchen to her living room.

Once she was home, her scythe disappeared from her shaking hand. She closed her eyes tightly. She could hear Barry moving in the bedroom. He had been putting books on the shelves Magnus had made them.

“Babe? You back already?”

She opened her mouth, but closed it again. Her voice stuck in her throat. Tears started flowing down her face, as she choked on air. _Calm down. Calm down. Barry doesn’t need to deal with this…_

_You can handle this._

_You handled things in the umbrastaff…_

_You did that alone…_

_You can do this alone, too…_

_Alone._

_Still alone._

An involuntary cry erupted from her throat. Half of her thoughts for twelve years had been keeping Taako safe, seeing her brother again.

And, now he didn’t trust her.

“Lup, what’s up? I thought–” Barry caught sight of her, as he entered the room, “Oh my gods…” He ran to her side. “What happened? What’s wrong? Is Taako hurt?” 

Lup shook her head furiously.

He placed his hands on her shoulders, and she leaned in, collapsing against his chest.

Gently, as he did everything, he guided them both to the couch, where she curled against his side.

When her sobs subsided into sniffles, she became aware of his fingers running through her hair and a kiss pressed to the top of her head. “What happened? You said you were going to be at Taako’s until late.” He murmured into her hairline.

She shuddered, “He doesn’t want to see me.”

“What? That can’t–Did he say that?” Soothing hands mitigated the shock in his tone.

“No…not really.” 

“Then what happened?”  


“He said he didn’t trust me.” Her voice cracked. “He doesn’t trust me anymore, because I was gone. And, I know it was hard, but I was trapped. It’s not like I chose to abandon him. How could he…”

She trailed off, as the hand in her hair stopped.

_Fuck._

Suddenly, she pulled away. Barry’s eyes were like saucers. Her eyes grew to match.

“No.”

“Okay, Lup, listen…” He was looking at her like a she was startled deer, which in some distant way, she supposed made sense, because she sort of felt like one.

“What the hell, Barry.” She wasn’t angry this time. She was devastated. _This can’t be happening._

Barry reached a hand towards her, but she beat it away, standing. Maybe she was angry. She couldn’t make sense of anything. Her heart didn’t trust her, and her love didn’t trust her either. What was the point? Why had she searched? Why had she fought? And died? And lived and struggled? What did anything matter if the two people she loved most in the world didn’t understand?

She bolted. 

As fast as she could walk, she left the living room, scythe appearing in her hand, as she reached their front hallway.

She was going to go…

_Where?_

When she was upset with Taako, she went to Barry. When she was upset with Barry, she went to Taako. She hardly was ever truly upset with either, and now both options were gone, and she had nowhere to go.

With a frustrated moan, she collapsed to the ground. It probably looked melodramatic, but she didn’t care. She felt empty. The floor seemed like a good option.

“Are you leaving again?” Behind her, Barry’s voice was trembling.

“Where would I even go?”

With a sigh, Barry said, “I don’t know, Lup. That’s the problem.”

She just stared into space for an unknown period of time before whispering, “You really don’t trust me?”

“It’s complicated.”  
  
“I don’t see how.”

Barry paused, “Can I…can we talk?” He knelt on the floor in front of her.

She met his eyes and nodded. He maneuvered to sit. She watched him try to form words several times, before she prodded him, “Well?”

“It’s just…we didn’t–you didn’t…you left and wrote ‘Back soon.’”

Lup groaned, “I didn’t choose that. I was trapped–”

“No, Lup, it’s not that. It’s not that you said ‘back soon,’ and you weren’t. It’s that ‘back soon’ was all you said.”

Lup furrowed her brow. “I don’t understand.”

“Lup…you could have taken me with you. Or Taako. Or Magnus for protection or Merle for healing! Any one of us would have helped you. You could have told Davenport, our captain, what you were doing! Left a note with any clue of where you were going, but you didn’t. All you wrote was ‘Back soon,’ and then you disappeared, leaving us wondering what we did to drive you away.”

She shook her head, “You didn’t do anything wrong–”

“I know that now, but…when we say we don’t trust you, it’s not that we think you’re lying. When we say we don’t trust you…it’s that we’re afraid you might not be telling us everything we should know. We’re afraid we might lose you again.”

“Why…” she paused to work out her thoughts, “Why didn’t Taako say this?”

“He may not know yet. He knows things are different. His trust is even harder to earn than it was before, and that includes his trust of you, but you were wiped from Taako’s memory for years. For most of the time, I knew who you were, what you meant to me, and I had time to process what I was feeling and why I was so hurt. Taako’s dealing with this now. All the emotions are hitting at once. The joy of having you back, despair knowing he even lost you, and confusion why everything is different.” Cautiously, Barry reached towards her, taking her hand in his, "He just needs time.”

“Oh…” 

He squeezed her palm, softly. “And, Lup…this isn’t a forever thing. We love you, and we want to trust you, just like before. We’re going to work hard to fix this, and eventually, if you let us, we’ll figure it out again.”

She smiled softly, “Okay.”

She heard Barry’s stone of farspeech ring. He walked over to answer it.

“Hi…yes–okay. Yes, don’t worry. She’s here–She’s with me. Yeah…do you want to talk to her?” He paused, listening to the voice on the other line.

He walked around to catch her eye again, “Lup, do you want to talk to Taako?”

She looked up, reaching her hand for the stone. “Hey…”

“Lulu–” Taako’s voice on the other end was strained.

“I’m sorry for leaving.”

There was a long pause, the breathing on the other end of the line the only proof her brother hadn’t hung up. “Today, or–”

“Ever. I’m sorry for ever leaving. I should have known better. I do really stupid things without you.”

There was a high-pitched, watery laugh, “Yeah, Lulu, same. I make some really stupid choices without you, too.”

“Come over tomorrow. We didn’t get nearly enough twin time today.”

“Okay, what time?”

“Anytime. I’ll be right here, I promise.”

Taako took a deep breath, “Really?”

“Absolutely.”

“Good.”

_Good._

It wasn’t good. Not yet. But, it would be.

**Author's Note:**

> I have had this idea for ages, and finally got to writing it.
> 
> I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy!


End file.
